September 2012 – blog.colorcode.com

Ask the Expert

Dear Jeremy,

I work in a company with a little over 10,000 employees, and in the top leadership tier, I have two VPs that I’m currently dealing with that I’m not sure how to handle. They are both Red, and when they run their individual teams, they’re amazing, but when they work together on our executive team, they are constantly butting heads. What can I do to make this work?
Gavin

Dear Gavin,
What you have described to me sounds like a classical Red on Red issue that actually isn’t too tough to resolve. Here’s what typically happens: Reds by nature love to fit into leadership roles, and why not? They are driven, assertive, focused, and so visionary that they are always thinking five years down the road. That’s the positive side. On the flip side, they will also battle for control and believe that they are always right. When left alone to manage their respective teams, they are great, because they are in charge, which others readily recognize, and they call the shots. When forced to work together, however, what you are running into is basically a turf war.

Here’s what I mean: They are both convinced that their way is better. Plus, they are highly competitive, and are therefore willing to fight for their ideas. So, how do you solve this? Remember to always go back to the Driving Core Motive of the people involved. In this case, they are both Red. They are both driven by power. They both want to get from “A to B.” Well, what is “B?” In this case, it is likely that they want the company and the executive team to be successful. They want a positive result. And, by the way, they want to look good to their superiors and/or the board of directors. You can use this knowledge to your advantage when you discuss this with them.

Here are a couple of things to remember when you have the conversation with them, which you can do with them together, by the way. First of all, you want to keep the conversation brief, factual, and to the point. Do not spend the meeting talking about how valued they are and how people look to their example, and therefore it’s important that they get along. Just stick to the facts. Tell them the truth. “The company needs this team to be successful, and the two of you aren’t working so well together,” might be a way of opening the conversation up. If you are not Red, this may seem difficult or too bold, perhaps, but the point is you must communicate in a way that will mean something to them in their Red “language.” You can tell them that it is obvious that they are both highly successful in their own teams and that you expect them to lend their talent in a more positive way to the executive committee.

Here’s the part where you assert your leadership: Give each of them a specific set of responsibilities within the committee, and tell them that they are to allow each other room to operate in their respective areas. When the team comes together to discuss things that need to be done, both of them can participate openly, but once decisions are made, they are individually responsible for their portions only. Really, all you are doing is separating the turf. If they really are both highly capable and produce results, chances are that they have mutual respect for each other. If they don’t respect each other, you have a deeper problem, especially because they are both Red, but we won’t get into that in this column.

The point is they have to rely on each other to get the job done. They both hate to waste time. They both want to get to “B.” You decide who is in charge of what, or which type of issues, and clearly delineate the line of responsibility. This will actually free both of them to not get caught up in what doesn’t reflect on them individually. Consequently, they will both work to make their respective assignments successful just as they do with their own teams.

Continued Success!

Jeremy Daniel

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Confessions of a Red—Trick or Treat

I have two granddaughters, both born and raised in the same household by the same parents and yet, they couldn’t be more different. The oldest, age 12, is clearly a Red. She is determined, confident, impatient, and more than a little bossy. Her younger sister, age 8, is as Yellow as can be. She is happy, charismatic, and, yes, sociable. I love her with all my heart, but sometimes I want to ask her to please be quiet for just a minute to give her Red grandma a little respite. But, I don’t.

As Halloween approaches, all the talk is about what they “want to be” on that magical occasion.

My Red invariably goes for the creepy costumes. Being, say a cheerleader, isn’t good enough. She has to be of the bloodied, ghoulish, undead variety of cheerleader.

My Yellow? Well, she likes the princess, angel, or good witch look. She is pretty—and knows it. She doesn’t want blood and gore to mare her own good-looking self. No matter what she is, you can count on her costume being festooned with lots of glitter, sequins, streamers, and other spangley detritus.

But Halloween isn’t just for kids. According to the National Retail Federation, $1.2 billion will be spent on adult costumes this year. The witch costume remains at the top of the popularity chart, but this year plan on seeing a fair share of zombies, vampires, and other creatures made popular by best selling books and movies.

Given what we know about the colors of the Color Code, it would be fun to guess what each color will be on Halloween.

Reds are motivated by power. They like to be in control, experience challenging adventure, and need to be respected. What better costumes than a witch, a vampire, or something really scary like a CEO?

Blues are motivated by Intimacy. They have the natural gift of quality and service. They like to be good, and need to be appreciated. They would be the perfect super hero, nurse, doctor, or President of the United States.

Yellows are motivated by Fun. They are fun loving, carefree, and not a little vain. They make the perfect fairy, princess, sumo-wrestler, pirate, or any other character that personifies fun.

Whites are motivated by Peace. They would rather stay home and turn off the porch light, so they are unbothered by trick or treaters that require social niceties. If they are required to go to a costume party, they are likely to go to the nearest drugstore and buy the least expensive mask.

If none of these appeal, maybe Halloween is a good time to try on your secondary colors just to let loose and mix things up a bit.

Whatever you decide, have and safe and happy Halloween.

Teresa Glenn has been working with the Color Code since 2006, where her main focus is product development. She has been in the publishing and product development field for over 20 years. Teresa is a core Red with a strong Yellow secondary.

Reduction In Force

SCENARIO:

While the economy seems to be improving, and unemployment numbers are stabilizing, we are still seeing employers that are faced with a reduction in force. As difficult as it is for managers to give this terrible news, it is even more difficult to be on the receiving end. So what can you do as a manager? How can you make the news a little more bearable? Each color will prefer to have this conversation differently.

LIKELY REACTION:

REDS:

In having this difficult conversation with a Red, don’t bother beating around the bush. Reds respond best to direct communication. Don’t ramble on with excuses, personal feelings, etc. Instead, tell them the facts. The Red employee will want to know why he or she is being fired, so be prepared with a logical, concise answer. If your reason is logical, a healthy Red will respond well. Although he or she will not enjoy hearing the news (who would?), a healthy Red will respect your leadership decision and see the value in doing what’s best for the company’s success. An unhealthy Red, however, may want to challenge your authority (especially if he or she doesn’t see the logic in your decision).

Red employees will not find comfort in hearing your personal feelings about the situation. Rather, they will want to hear just the bottom line (after all, the minute they hear the news they will probably begin planning their next move). Offer your assistance in making the transition smooth and in whatever the Red’s future plans might be. Reds like to feel in control, so naturally this situation is going to be unsettling for them. If possible, allow Red employees some say in what is happening—keep them up to date and, when appropriate, allow them to make some decisions.

BLUES:

Having to tell someone his or her job is being eliminated is never easy, and with Blues the conversation seems even more difficult. As Blues are hard on themselves, they are going to take the news quite hard. So what can a manager do to help the Blue manage this stressful news? A good manager will be sincere and genuine in explaining the situation. This will help greatly and reduce friction during the conversation. Remember, Blues need security and this situation will undoubtedly take them to the edge. The manager who takes time to explain why this is taking place and is willing to answer the Blue’s questions, will help the Blue see the road ahead.

Now that the manager has set the tone for the conversation, the next step would be to commend the employee for all his or her dedication and hard work. Although to some this might seem like a slap in the face, Blues will take it to heart, as they pride themselves on being at the top of their game. Blues can accept bad news, as long as it is given in a respectful and thorough manner. The manager should take time to express gratitude and appreciation for all the Blue employee has done. As long as there is kindness and respect in the manager’s tone, Blues will respect the position of the manager having to make these tough decisions.

Although these days are stressful, remember there is a person at the opposite end of the table. The manner in which you handle the conversation has a lasting impact.

WHITES:

The most important thing to remember when breaking bad news to a White is to take the logical path. The manager who explains in a clear and concise manner to the White will have a much better outcome. Whites are very logical and like their information in that manner. Whites are known for their clarity, so don’t bother trying to fool them; they’ll see right through you. Be honest, but don’t be rude. Whites are kind and respond well to kindness in others.

The manager should not come across too intense, as Whites will not react well to this type of behavior. Whites will accept what is taking place, but that doesn’t mean they are happy. They understand situations with such clarity that they tend not to get caught up in the emotion (don’t expect to see a huge display of emotion during the conversation). Rather, they take it all in and look forward to the next step. Whites are great listeners, so the manager should seize this moment, perhaps adding career goals as they begin their search for new work. This is something a White will appreciate, as they are great at taking input from others.

Remember, we are all human and need to help one another through difficult situations. The time you take today could greatly enhance someone’s life tomorrow.

YELLOWS:

Yellows hate negativity. So, even in a negative situation like this, you must try to stay positive. Be as upbeat as you can, and the Yellow employee will really appreciate it. You can be positive by praising the good the employee has brought and showing your appreciation for all the work he or she has done. Try not to be too critical. Remember, Yellows love to be loved, so don’t make the situation personal. (You can still like this person, even though you have to fire him or her). Reinforce all the things you like about the Yellow employee.

Because they are so lively and enthusiastic, we often forget that Yellows are quite sensitive. Although you should try to be upbeat and positive, don’t be insensitive. Give Yellows a chance to express themselves. They are sometimes afraid of facing the facts, so be patient while they process what is happening. Offer your help in getting them organized and ready for the next step they’ll be taking. Yellows are forgiving by nature, so they likely will not hold a grudge. They’ll want to leave on good terms, having celebrated their achievements and after plenty of goodbye parties!

Ask the Expert

Dear Jeremy,

I recently heard somebody referred to as a “Healthy Blue”. Can you please explain what that means? Does it imply that somebody could be an “Unhealthy Blue,” for instance? Thanks!

Debbie

Dear Debbie,

How very observant of you! Thanks for submitting this question. I would love to explain what this means.

Anyone who has been around the Color Code for very long has heard us speaking in terms of “Healthy,” “Unhealthy,” “Charactered,” and/or “Dysfunctional”. For example, we may refer to somebody as a “Charactered White”.

Whenever you hear any of these terms, we are referring to a part of the growth process Dr. Hartman calls “The Charactered Path”.

Most people reading this will probably be familiar with Dr. Hartman’s first work, “The Color Code” (now available as “The People Code“). A smaller portion of our readers will be familiar with Dr. Hartman’s second book, “The Character Code” (now available as “Color Your Future“) and/or his third book, “Playing Life to Win“.

Those two books are followup works to The Color Code and they build upon Dr. Hartman’s understanding of personality and personal development.

The Color Code is a blueprint for first, understanding yourself and what makes you “tick”. This is accomplished through discovering and learning about your Driving Core Motive – the engine that drives your personality. The Color Code also teaches us about others and what motivates them to do what they do. The understanding of self and others enables people of all walks of life to significantly improve their relationships with others and therefore their own personal and professional effectiveness.

So, what happens after you get the Color Code?

The answer to that question is that you have to learn about how to change and develop yourself; how to break old habits; how to learn new skills, etc. That’s precisely where The Character Code comes in as outlined in Color Your Future and Playing Life to Win.

Obviously, we all change in life. Some changes are for the better, and unfortunately some are not. That’s where the “Charactered Path” picks up. We use the terms, “Charactered,” “Healthy,” “Unhealthy,” and “Dysfunctional” to describe which path an individual might be on at any given time. I’ll give an explanation of those four terms below:

A “Charactered” individual is a person who is really working on positive growth. Specifically, what we mean is that this person is developing Color Code strengths outside his/her own Core Color. For instance, if a Red was to learn to be compassionate (a Blue trait) we would consider that kind of growth to be “Charactered”, because the Red is stretching beyond their natural strengths and striving towards positive growth.
A “Healthy” individual is a person who is really good at working from his/her own strengths (inside his/her Core Color), but is not necessarily trying to reach beyond them. For example, if a Blue was found to be compassionate – even if that compassion was learned – we would consider that to be “Healthy” behavior. That means that the behavior is still positive, but it didn’t necessarily require someone to go above and beyond our expectations for them in their Core Color.
An “Unhealthy” individual, then is a the opposite of a “Healthy” individual. He/She operates out of limitations inside his/her Core Color. An example of this would be an irresponsible Yellow. The behavior is limiting, but it is not necessarily uncommon for a person of that Color Code.
Last of all, we have the “Dysfunctional” category. A person in this area is living out of limitations outside his/her Core Color. This becomes very problematic for that person, because their limiting behavior seems so unnatural, forced, or even purposeful. Their thinking is clouded, and they often struggle with carrying deep insecurities as well as appearing to be extremely incongruent in the eyes of others. An example of a “Dysfunctional” individual would be a irresponsible White.

I hope this explanation is helpful to you, Debbie. If you would like to learn more, I would recommend that you read, Color Your Future. It is an excellent book!

Very best of living,

Jeremy Daniel

Jeremy Daniel (Core Color: Yellow) has been working with the Color Code since 1998 in various capacities from training in the field personally with Dr. Taylor Hartman to designing customized corporate solutions and new training programs for various industries. To ask about Jeremy’s training or speaking services, please email and inquiry to jeremy@colorcodetraining.com.

Confessions of a Red—Social Networking

Lately, I have been thinking about social networking and what personalities are drawn to it.

For instance, I have accounts on Facebook, Linkedin, Twitter, Eons, etc.–but don’t really participate. I don’t post, re-post, share, or poke. If anything, I am more of a voyeur. I will toggle through to see if there is anything interesting going on, and I do enjoy reading news from my scattered family. But, I have a hard time getting excited about the hen that my niece just bought for her Farmville farm, or working up a warm-fuzzy feeling about the plethora of cute cat posters that abound. And now, with the election heating up, I really don’t want to watch that train wreck. People can get downright ugly.

Growing up, my brothers were friends with “Bob.” I have always liked Bob and when he asked me to be his “friend” I accepted. I have since learned more about Bob than I wanted to know. I have learned that he has a very crude sense of humor, is quite self-absorbed, has opinions and is not shy about sharing them—probably a fellow Red.

Unlike most people in my family, I am somewhat apolitical. I do vote, but mostly because I’m afraid my mother will haunt me if I don’t. I try to be well-informed before voting and I am willing to listen to well-articulated reasons for backing a candidate. Bob’s definition of well articulated and mine are very different. He thinks he can sway his Facebook friends to his side by calling the candidates he doesn’t like cruel names. Reminds me of when we were little kids. “I’m not voting for him because he’s a stupid-head.” (OK, it wasn’t that juvenile, but close). Like I said, I don’t normally post on Facebook, but when I read this, I wrote one word “boo.” He promptly told me to go do something I’m pretty sure is anatomically impossible. I promptly unfriended him.

I’m not sure Facebook is the best spot for Reds anyway. We are too opinionated and when you aren’t face to face, it is much easier to sling snide or cruel barbs. People forget that when you argue online it’s like being a contender at a prize-fight full of spectators. And, sadly, your insensitive comments are up there forever.

No…I see Facebook as the realm of the Blues and the Yellows. They are social creatures that post often, and in great detail. For example, my Yellow niece posted: “I’m going to the DMV.” Ten minutes later: “I’m at the DMV.” Five minutes later: “I hate the DMV.” She is so full of herself that she assumes we want a blow-by-blow of her day. I have another “friend” who is Blue and an animal (mostly dog) enthusiast. She scours the internet to find all kinds of dog stories, pictures and anecdotes. They are happy, sad, cute, and most of all abundant.

Yellows and Blues are the ones who share pictures and stories of their families, post the cute cat posters, and share the latest find from Pinterest. They hit the like button often, are delighted by posts and reply their delight. They LOL, OMG, ETC. They are who put the “social” in social networking. It is their element.

My White son isn’t interested in the whole Facebook thing. He is quiet, thoughtful, intelligent, and when he finally does says something, it is concise and to the point—all in 140 characters or less. Yes, his networking site of choice it Twitter. What better place for a White? On Twitter, you “follow” someone, or they follow you. You don’t feel the overwhelming commitment of being “friends.” You can read the tweets if you want, or ignore them if you choose. If you get tired of someone, you just quit following him or her. No big deal. Meh.

And so, I watch. I continue to be amused by my Yellow niece, admire my Blue friend’s charity, and even follow my son’s thoughts of 140 characters or less. Hmmm. Maybe social networking is for me after all.

Back to School Tips for Parents

If you have more than one child, you have come to the realization that regardless of the fact that they were raised in the same environment, siblings can be very different. Following are some tips on what you can expect now that the new school year is upon us.

Red Students

Whether in kindergarten or grad school, a Red is only there because they need the experience to further their success. Otherwise, why bother? They already know everything. In fact, Red children are often the ones that leave school too soon because they’re bored.

The biggest problem that teachers (especially Blue teachers) have with Red students is that Red children don’t care who is the adult or who has authority. They are very direct and will challenge anyone. They are highly verbal, so it’s very tough for them just to shut up. When they’re in a debate, they’re going to carry it to the end—even if it means being punished. Typically, they just want to express themselves. Red children are very defiant. They will take you on. A red child will respect appropriate standards, but not roadblocks. Don’t be petty. Throw them a bone once in awhile. If you want to win the war, then let them win some battles.

Blue Students

Blue children, on the other hand are very obedient. They will do what you tell them to do because they should. They come home on time. They do their homework to please their teacher.

They are very loving kids and can get their feelings hurt easily. If you hurt them, they will remember. They seek your approval and physical affection. Take the time to touch them, to talk with them. Share their day with them.

They will also remember, and appreciate that you were a room mother or that you took off work to come to their programs. They’ll let you know, “I want you to be where I am.”

Blue children can be devastated by a scolding. They feel guilty already. Remember, that when you are disciplining them you don’t have to do much, because they punish themselves enough.

White Students

White children are probably the most blessed gift a parent will ever receive. Their needs are so few they are easy to accommodate. They are not demanding. They don’t require great fanfare. There is a quiet, unique gentleness about them. This promotes family harmony. They are the children who travel through life with an even temper. New experiences can traumatize White children however, because they are typically shy. They do not easily step outside of their comfort zone.

White children are often overlooked. If you’re the parent of a White student and are paying taxes, you are not getting your money’s worth. They are the nicest, easiest children in the world. They don’t fight. They don’t cause contention. They don’t get in anyone’s way. But they also get overlooked. If a teacher has thirty kids, she is grateful for the few who will sit quietly at the back of the room while she attends to the others.

One of the problems with White children is that sometimes they approach life too casually. This can be seen in their aimless and misguided natures. For example, White children forget lunches, musical instruments, or that they need two-dozen cookies by tomorrow morning.

Yellow Students

Yellow is the color for kids. Yellow children are quite entertaining, but watch out for your Yellow student. They prioritize play over work. This is very difficult for people to understand, especially Reds and Blues. But Yellows believe that play is productive.

Yellows also have a lot of excuses. They are terrible at being pinned down. You ask where their homework is, and they will make up story after story. They have lots of excuses for everything.

Yellows are also very forgetful people. To complete a task, they need a specific timeline, directions to follow, and constant reminders. Yellows are rather messy and sloppy in their work habits. They produce material that most teachers cringe over and parents are rather embarrassed about. But, teachers will often tell you how much they love your Yellow student and how bad they feel giving them an F.

Conclusion

Keep in mind that all the colors have different study habits, attitudes about school, and interactions with you and their education provider. Don’t expect each to behave the same. Take the time to learn the needs and wants of each child and create an environment that will help them in their academic success. CC