March 2022 – blog.colorcode.com

Redefining Happiness at Work Using Our Color Code Toolbox

Are you happy at work? Are we supposed to be? Don’t scroll yet.

What if we took that “happy” word that has so many meanings and consider this: what would happen if we took a different approach and planned for the pursuit of purpose while recognizing how we can find strength in our collective differences to improve our happiness?

Let me be clear. False happiness is worse than no happiness at all. If you are a person who is still working on finding your purpose, you are not alone. Even more, if you are not a “naturally sunshiney” personality, I would offer that greater self-awareness leads to greater discovery of purpose and yes – the elusive “happiness.”

Yet, how do we get that awareness? Over the last several years, the Color Code Personality Profile has been a tremendous tool in my self-awareness and growth. Back in 2017 (which really does feel like a lifetime ago!), my husband and I were listening to a Color Code speaker. I exclaimed, “I’m a Red! You’re a White! And this explains everything!” He agreed. It was a game changer.

I may be exaggerating a small bit, but not by much. Are you asking any of the following questions right now?

How was it a game changer?
What is the end goal of this blog?
Why are you telling me this?
Who are you?

If you tell me your Color Code profile, I can tell you which of these questions just might be the one you asked. Is the Color Code sorcery? Absolutely not. Self-fulfilling prophecy? Again, no. A strong communication tool that can be the linchpin for pursuing our purpose? Most definitely, yes!

So, what is one small thing each personality type can start working on to strive for a happier life or moving towards the pursuit of their innate purpose?

Let me start with the Reds. We most definitely are the ones that need to have a backup pair of Patience Pants! As a Red with a Secondary Blue, I will do much better with finding some value in the process itself, not just reaching the end goal! A Blue colleague who is married to a strong Red reminded me that the Red might lose heart if they do not see the value in the process. I need to remember that as I move from leaving a firm where I have been for 10 years to taking an advanced role elsewhere. Right now, I know my job well. I know who to call for help and am a regular resource for people of all levels. I have created and implemented valuable programs and helped people with their professional growth. While I made the decision to change (and keep my Blue limitations in check) to a new firm where I will be able to develop my natural leadership skills and be more deeply involved in a variety of programs, I have to remember a key rule of mine: Practice a beginner’s mindset. Be willing to suck at something new. Why? Because, as much as we Reds like to think we know it all, a self-aware Red will realize we do not. And that improves my happiness.

For my friends who are a primary Blue — a decision to make this kind of move might look a little bit different! A Blue is often going to think about relationships, why the change, and potentially hyper-focus on the gravity of the decision. This can affect the happiness of the Blue — and yes — the happiness of those who are around them! Dear Blues (or those of us with a secondary….), may I offer this? It is a decision, not the end of the world. Feelings are not facts — so take some cues from your logical Red and White friends to look at the facts of your decision so that the fear (False Evidence Appearing Real) does not win. I once was told, “You cannot be curious and fearful at the same time.” Blues, Embrace the opportunity, trusting you will make a good decision, then enjoy the change you experience as much as you can. Be willing to know when you are leaning towards analysis paralysis. If you make a mistake (let me rephrase, when you make a mistake), give yourself grace. We must make mistakes to improve. And Blues, you are amazing with quality and process improvement! Consider these adjustments to moving towards better things. Be cognizant of not taking the pivots and twists personally so you can keep your self-esteem intact. You are valuable and here for a reason. Always remember — you do not always get to know the “why” to it all. Seek out that logical friend who can provide the clarity you need in the midst of the emotions you feel. By accepting the flaws, your happiness will increase.

Speaking of our logical White friends, we need you and your lovely spirit of peace! Your superpower is the ability to provide clarity in a complicated situation. You are a gift to this world. What we also encourage and need you to do: Speak up. Branch out. Shake it up. I know, I know. I was recently coaching a person with the primary White personality. They are about to complete their degree and are looking for their first job in the field. When I sent them several names of people to contact, I had to remember that while this may be natural for some of us, I was suggesting some very unusual and scary action for many with this personality profile. Ask others who do not know me for information? Get help instead of just giving up? Potentially be uncomfortable? Yes. Yes. Yes. Why? Because it is going to help you move to a great next step for which you have worked so hard. By taking small risks, you will build confidence to do the scary things — like getting that new position or asking for a raise or networking to find a new organization. A Red can be your best ally in this. Be sure to tell them what you need, indicate when you need a break, and let them engage you into more confidence than you can imagine! That next job could be a game changer!

My last thought for these patient folks: Silence is not always golden. By not speaking up for yourself and your needs, people will assume you are fine. Happy with the money you make. Happy with your present position. Happy as you are. However, I know from experience that once you recognize your amazing self fully that you will move into your innate purpose, too!

Last, but never least, let us talk about Yellows. You may love change! Adventure! New things! If you have a strong secondary, ensure you learn the nuances of the strengths and limitations of your secondary color. Character counts and you may need the “d” word. D? D as in discipline. By adding just a little to your repertoire, it will help you move forward even more and can influence your happiness! And, when you feel yourself getting down or having an experience where you may not feel like your typical “sunshiney self,” advocate for yourself and accept that you may have to let someone know. It is ok not to feel fun all the time. It is ok if you cannot bring your typical joy. Let your people know you need some space to build back your energy. During that season, allow yourself not to dwell on how you “look” — remember your other strengths, such as inclusion. The joy you get from helping others not to always dwell on every hard thing. Do this for yourself, too.

How to conclude this? Learn your Color Code personality. It is not your identity nor the key to happiness. It is a tool in your toolbox for successful living that can lead to greater purpose and true joy. However you define happiness and purpose, may I offer, success in this is meant to be with others. We are better together.

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Kelly L. Knowles is a senior trainer at a regional law firm, where she develops and provides technical and professional skills training to all levels of the organization. Kelly is also an adjunct instructor in the Business Management department at MTSU. In 2017, Kelly obtained a Color Code certification and began Kelly K. Consulting. Kelly K. Consulting focuses on helping individuals and teams discover, develop, and dig into their inner leader. She guides this through one-on-one and group coaching as well as through corporate team training.

Brightening the World through our Innate Color Code Gifts

In March 2007, Van and I had been training out West and were traveling back to Missouri. We were really, really hungry for an old-fashioned hamburger and had stopped several times along the way looking for one of those “greasy, hole-in-the-wall” kind of places, but we couldn’t seem to find one.

We stopped at an old truck stop on the Missouri/Iowa line to buy a bag of M&M’s and a cup of coffee. Much to our surprise, when we walked into the truck stop, we were met with a most wonderful fragrance: the smell of “the old-fashioned hamburger” we had been looking for the past 200 miles. We were so excited! We knew we had found our dinner.

It didn’t take Van long to find the grill. He watched an older lady preparing a hamburger for a man dressed in farmer’s overalls. As she wrapped his specially prepared burger in aluminum foil, she said, “That will be $3.49, Harold.” Harold said, “Thank you, Dora,” as he paid with a roll of farmer’s cash. Van, standing on Harold’s heels, could barely keep from pushing Harold out of the way.

Finally, Harold stepped aside, and Van, as only Van can do, leaned on the counter and said, “Dora, where have you been all my life?” Dora looked at him rather sheepishly and said, “Can I help you?” We are guessing she had a White personality. On the inside, she was probably thinking, “Oh boy, another one of these.”

Van ordered a special burger, just like Harold’s and asked her to cut it in half. It was huge! As he watched Dora work, he was impressed with the care and quality with which she prepared our burger. As she brought the burger to the counter and started to wrap it in foil, Van said, “Please…. wait, I promise I’ll pay you, but I can’t wait any longer. I have to taste this burger right now!” Van’s response to his bite of burger: “Mmmmmmmmmmmm!” (He sounded a lot like Bill Murray in the movie, “What about Bob?”)

As he reached for his wallet to pay, he said, (while still chewing the burger) “That is the best hamburger I have ever tasted. I watched you make that burger. This place is lucky to have you. Making a hamburger like this is a lost art. Thank you so much for our burger. You have just made our day!”

We took our burger and sat down at a table to enjoy our find. After eating my half of the burger, I walked over to the little gift shop and began looking at the book section. While shopping, Dora said to me, “Ma’am, will you please tell the man out front thank you?” I thought that was rather odd, but said, “Yes, of course.” She politely said, “Thank you.” I stopped my shopping and told Van, thinking he must have given her a tip or something. When I told him that the lady in the back had told me to tell him thank you, he asked, “What for?” I said, “I don’t know; she just told me to tell you thank you.”

Well, curiosity got the best of him, and he headed to the grill and called out to Dora…. “Dora, Dora, excuse me.” It took her a few seconds to respond, as she had her back to him, briskly cleaning the grill, but she finally turned around. He said, “My wife told me that you said to tell me thank you. I don’t know if that was meant for me, but if it was, I’m curious, what are you thanking me for?”

Dora slowly turned and pulled her apron off, hanging it gently on the hook by the door. She came all the way out to the front of the counter and sheepishly said, almost in a whisper, being careful not to make eye contact, “Well…. you see, sir, I come in here every day, and all I do is cook hamburgers. Most days, I feel like my life doesn’t count for much, but you made me feel special today. I just wanted to thank you for thanking me for your hamburger.”

Stunned and with tears filling his eyes, Van paused, trying to gather himself. Finally, he spoke. “Dora, you don’t know me, but my wife and I teach people about their God-given personalities. We tell them about the gifts they have inside them through their personality. These gifts are given to us to give away, to make the world a better place. I am, by nature, an encourager, I almost always see the good in people, and I do love to make people smile. I didn’t realize just how important these gifts are.” He paused again, trying to control his emotions, “Today, when you thanked me for making you feel special, you taught me to value and appreciate my ability to make people smile and to make people feel good about life.” He thanked her for thanking him for thanking her and told her, “You have blessed me today.”

With a tear slipping down her cheek and her eyes wide with surprise, Dora said, “Wow, that’s funny.” She paused and then gently continued, “I prayed today, on my way to work, that God could…. somehow…. use my life to be a blessing to someone.” Van stepped back, gently shaking his head. He said, with a slight chuckle, “Well, you got that one answered!” As Van and Dora stood there with tears running down their cheeks, Van, in his sweet way, said, “Can I have a hug?” With a welcoming shrug, Dora said, “Well, sure.”

What an extraordinary moment! Two strangers, hugging in the middle of a truck stop on the Missouri/Iowa line, two strangers who had made a difference in each other’s lives.

There are three lessons to be learned from Dora and this story about valuing the gifts God has placed inside you:

Pray each morning that God will use you to be a blessing to someone in some way.
Give your gifts, whatever they are, wherever you are, intentionally to lend a hand and to be an encourager. Give a smile or a kind word to a stranger.
Stay alert and know that you can be a blessing. When you are a blessing, you make the world a better place.

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Van and Tammy Benson live in Mount Vernon, Missouri. They have 4 daughters, 4 sons-in-law and 11 grandchildren. They love the message of the Color Code more than ever! For more information, visit their websites www.MotiveMatters.com and www.ColorYourMarriage.com.

Teamwork and My Color Code Story

During a 26-year naval career, one of my tours of duty brought me to the Washington DC area. It was around this time that I married and brought my new bride there to start our life’s journey together. She is an operating room nurse and eventually took a department manager position at one of the largest metropolitan hospitals in the area in the mid-1990s.

Her hospital’s management team scheduled an offsite conference for all department managers, which included a Color Code workshop facilitated by Dr. Taylor Hartman. At the conclusion of the workshop, she and her colleagues were amazed at how accurately the descriptions of their personality colors reflected them. My wife decided that she wanted to answer her suspicions of what my personality color, including my driving core motive, was. At the workshop, she purchased a copy of The Color Code and had Dr. Hartman include a personalized inscription. At the time, I was deployed, but shortly after I returned home, she presented me with the book and said, “Read it! Then do the assessment.”

Well, as a practitioner of the philosophy, “A happy wife is a happy life,” I immediately followed her directive. Upon learning of my results, she cracked a smirk and said, “I knew it! You are a Yellow.” Not only am I a Yellow personality, but pretty much a purist. My driving core motive is “fun.” After that, we administered the assessment to all our immediate family and close friends. I must admit that there were some surprises for us, but we found that for the most part, we recognized many of the traits as described. This knowledge has helped us frame conversations and sometimes difficult discussions with a knowledge of how the other person may receive the information and has proven a valuable tool in relationships with our family and friends. It’s exciting to learn about your strengths and quite humbling and cathartic to recognize your limitations.

Since retiring from the Navy, I now work as a project team development facilitator for aircraft carriers and submarines as they prepare to enter the shipyard for extended maintenance periods. My team brings together stakeholders responsible for performing maintenance and modernization on these national assets to support the project team in developing communication skills and relationships that provide the foundation of a high-performing team. We conduct a series of workshops, exercises and team-building activities to achieve that goal.

As I prepared a program for one of my project teams, the project supervisor told me that in the past, they had done assessments such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator and StrengthsFinder and was specifically looking for something to help team members better understand each other and improve communication among team members. I remembered how Color Code improved our immediate circle and approached my supervisor about becoming a Color Code facilitator to provide that service for our teams. She approved, and I was off to the races.

I had the team do the assessment prior to our week-long conference and conducted the workshop on the first day. I was able to weave in the content during the remainder of the week to illustrate the characteristics of their DCMs (Driving Core Motives). One of the products I provided my team with at the conclusion of the conference was a contact roster of the attendees. During the closing remarks, the project supervisor requested that I include each of their primary and secondary colors, so that when they returned to the shipyard, they could refer back to their colors and use that as a tool to improve communication among the team.

Since then, my facilitation team has increased our facilitator numbers and has executed many workshops for all the public and private shipyards on both the east and west coasts performing maintenance for the U.S. Navy. Color Code is proving a great tool in helping develop high-performing teams.

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Originally from the San Francisco Bay area, Mark Eller joined the US Navy at 17 and proudly served on submarines and surface ships during his 26-year career. After retiring from the Navy, he and his wife cruised on their sailboat for 2 years before settling in the Hampton Roads area of Virginia. Presently, Mark is a project team development facilitator, working with submarines and aircraft carriers as they prepare for extended shipyard maintenance availabilities. His team works with project stakeholders to improve communication, building high-performing teams to efficiently deliver these national assets back to the navy and out to conduct our nation’s business around the world. They use the Color Code personality assessment to help their teams better understand each other by improving communication and cooperation ,resulting in a more efficient and harmonious work environment. Mark is almost a purist Yellow personality.

Do This One Thing Every day For A Better Life. Guaranteed.

GRATITUDE

If you’re thinking that I’m being cheesy or a little too “Pollyanna” about this – please hear me out. There is a scientific foundation for what I’m saying.

Psychologist Robert Emmons has been researching gratitude from a scientific perspective for over 15 years. The following is a list of benefits that have been linked to increased levels of gratitude:

- Improved physical, emotional, and social well-being
- Greater optimism and happiness
- Improved feelings of connection in times of loss or crises
- Increased self-esteem
- Heightened energy levels
- Strengthened heart, immune system and decreased blood pressure
- Improved emotional and academic intelligence
- Expanded capacity for forgiveness
- Decreased stress, anxiety, depression, and headaches
- Improved self-care and greater likelihood to exercise
- Heightened spirituality – ability to see something bigger than ourselves

Who wouldn’t like to receive those kinds of benefits? In fact, many of the items on that list can, in and of themselves, yield life-changing benefits, and gratitude can be the very source of all of them!

Does that seem too good to be true?

Think about this logically. When you experience feelings of gratitude, doesn’t it seem like there are endless, abundant opportunities ahead of you? Compare that to times when you experience those “woe-is-me” moments. A negative mindset leaves you feeling scarcity—like you’ll never have enough—or that even if you try, you’ll probably just fail.

When teaching Color Code workshops, I talk about the strengths and limitations of each of the Color Code personality styles. One limitation that is common for Blues to struggle with is that of being worry-prone, whereas a common strength of the Yellows is to be optimistic.

Think about the difference there. If you are worry-prone, your mind is in a “negative goal setting” mode, but when you’re optimistic, you have the feeling that you can find a “silver lining” and a way to land on your feet. You activate your brain to find solutions as opposed to preparing for failure.

Gratitude, like optimism, is a state of mind, and you can adopt an “attitude of gratitude” and gain the power to transform your life in multiple ways for free.

One of the most common ways of doing this is by keeping a gratitude journal. Record three to five experiences that happened to you during the course of your day that you are grateful for.

Let yourself visualize the experiences again and feel and think through all of the implications of the life lessons you learned from those moments. If that sounds too easy to be effective, consider this:

Research shows that recording daily experiences for which you are grateful for only two consecutive weeks can result in positive effects sustained for up to six months. So be careful not to dismiss the idea of keeping a basic gratitude journal as being too simple.

Sometimes the simplest solutions are the most powerful ones.

There are many other ways to practice gratitude. Some pray to give thanks. Others have taken it upon themselves to write thank you cards daily. Others meditate and focus on being mindful of their feelings of gratitude.

I invite you to conduct an experiment of gratitude in your own life. Take from these ideas, or develop your own. As you increase the amount of gratitude you experience on a daily basis, you will begin to change and transform your entire life!

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Jeremy Daniel is the Vice President of Training for Color Code. He leads our Trainer Certification Program and has been teaching the Color Code and delivering motive-based applications to clients internationally since 1998.

Harry Potter and the Color Code Conflict

I’m a big Harry Potter fan. I own the audiobooks, two sets of the series printed in Britain, one set printed in America, a Russian version and a Chinese version. What can I say, I am a nerd. I’ve even found myself in conversations relating Harry Potter to the Color Code. My brother once asked me to quick code each of the four Hogwarts houses into the four personality types. Of course, I sorted the resourceful, power-hungry Reds into Slytherin, the adventurous, fun-loving Yellows into Gryffindor, the peacemaking, easygoing Whites into Hufflepuff and the responsible, perfectionistic Blues into Ravenclaw.

I’m currently listening to the series for the umpteenth time with a couple of friends for a Harry Potter Book Club. When I read the end of the Chamber of Secrets, the second book in the series, I tend to get emotional when Albus Dumbledore speaks one of the most profound lines of the entire saga. More on that in a minute.

To give a little background, Harry is wrestling with the idea that maybe the sorting hat put him in the wrong house. He remembers specifically asking the sorting hat not to put him into Slytherin, because he’d heard every witch and wizard who had turned bad came from that house. (Side note: The evil side of Slytherin is not meant to be compared to the Red personality.) The sorting hat tells him he’d do well in Slytherin, but takes his desire into account and ultimately sorts him into Gryffindor. Fast forward to the second book, and Harry learns he has more in common with the villainous Lord Voldemort (AKA Tom Riddle) than he ever realized. He wonders if he should have been a Slytherin after all.

When Dumbledore finally hears of Harry’s inner turmoil, the following conversation ensues: “[The Sorting Hat] only put me in Gryffindor,” said Harry in a defeated voice, because I asked not to go in Slytherin.” “Exactly,” said Dumbledore, beaming once more. “Which makes you very different from Tom Riddle. It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

So what does all of this have to do with the Color Code? Let me tell you. A few people I’ve met do not like the Color Code, or personality tests in general, because they feel like it puts them in a box. They don’t want their behavior chalked up to the fact that they “are just that way,” because they believe people are in charge of their actions. And of course, they are right about that part.

The Color Code is awesome in that it teaches us what our main motive in life is and outlines the strengths and limitations that come naturally to us. But that doesn’t mean we have to choose a life that leans into our limitations just because they come naturally. As Dumbledore said, “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

For example, as a White/Blue personality, I have historically struggled with timidity, conflict avoidance, overworry, oversensitivity, and perfectionism. These natural limitations have all contributed to my years-long struggle with anxiety and depression.

After becoming a mom, I knew I had to take charge of my life and work toward overcoming my crippling limitations. This was anything but easy and included taking medication and going to therapy regularly for 2 years. But after a lot of dedication, endurance, hard work and tears, I now feel like the choices I have made have helped me become a far better person than any of my abilities.

Now, when I feel myself wanting to get offended by a well-meaning but sarcastic Yellow or I spend too much time worrying about what I cannot control in the future, I am able to utilize the skills I’ve gained to set aside those limitations and live in my strengths. While it has been challenging to get to this place in my life, it’s been oh so rewarding.

So, next time you are tempted to blame bad behavior on what comes naturally to you or you curse the personality color you were born with, remember, “It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”

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Megan Christensen is a White personality who has loved writing for as long as she can remember. Megan graduated from BYU-Idaho in 2014 with a degree in communication. A lifelong fan of the Color Code, she’s thrilled to be the content editor of the blog and hopes to help as many people as possible become more self-aware. When she’s not writing, Megan can be found reading, doing yoga, and spending as much time as she can outdoors.