Red: “Do what I say, and we’ll get along just fine.”

Blue: “Tell me you appreciate me, and I’ll walk to the ends of the earth for you.”

Welcome to the complicated relationship of Reds and Blues. A relationship combination that you’ve probably heard us lovingly refer to in the past as “Blood, Sweat, and Tears.”  

Truthfully, we could talk about this combination for hours, but for the sake of time, this article will focus on one particular tendency of the relationship blend and why it can cause problems if left unchecked:

The tendency that neither Reds nor Blues typically offer (at least for very long) what the other personality wants without FIRST expecting that their own needs be met.

Dr. Hartman has shared in the past a story that demonstrates this pretty well:

“A national sales manager (Red) for a training company requests telephone calls from each of his 30 trainers to inform him about the results of seminars they conducted. To the manager, results mean numbers, referrals, and bottom line. One of his top trainers is Blue. To him, results mean successful life changes and connections with his audience, as well as the bottom line. 

Prior to Blue knowing the Color Code, their weekly phone calls went like this: Blue trainer calls Red sales manager. Red sales manager is unavailable and prefers a message to be left on his voicemail. Blue wants to talk about the seminar directly, so he leaves a message to call him back. Frustrated Red sales manager calls back because he needs the numbers that Blue trainer refused to divulge without sharing stories of people and connections from the seminars. They play phone tag three times and finally connect. The dialogue follows:

Blue trainer: ‘We had 37 people at the seminar. Two people gave me referral cards for other companies to contact. But the best part was this guy who came up to me afterward and told me how the seminar had saved his job. He understands how to apply time-management principles better at home as well. He also wanted me to know—’

Red sales manager: ‘Thanks, Tom. I got the numbers, and I gotta go!’

Both hang up frustrated. 

The Red sales manager hates hearing from Tom each week, but he’s one of his top trainers.

The Blue (Tom) is frustrated when the sales manager stops him from sharing what really matters to him from the seminar. 

After Tom learned the Color Code, their dialogue went like this: 

Blue trainer (calls Red sales manager and gets voicemail): ‘Hi. This is Tom. I had 37 people in Dallas. We got two referrals and faxed them to Cindy for follow-up. ‘Bye for now.’

Red sales manager: (Smiles listening to voicemail) transfers the numbers to his report and calls Tom regularly to check on how he is doing, because he wants him to feel connected since he’s a top trainer.

Note: Blue learned to speak Red’s language. Red gets his numbers, and Blue doesn’t take Red’s lack of interest personally. Blue is currently entertaining offers at other companies where he feels more connection. Red offered a salary increase. Blue accepted money and is still looking.”

Tom accepts the money at the end of the story, but is still looking for another job. This doesn’t surprise me one bit. A Blue will stay with a job and deal with a lot, because they are loyal and responsible by nature. However, they will look for an exit strategy if they don’t find the connection, validation, and appreciation they need.

In fact, along these lines, just last week, a good friend of mine (who has a Blue DCM) was telling me about his new job and how frustrated he was with his Red boss, because he had never shown my friend appreciation once in his first month on the job. My friend was already starting to second guess accepting the position—and this is by far the highest paying job he has ever had. Despite the great money, he was still unsatisfied because of a lack of appreciation. 

Now, let’s look at the story a little closer from the Red perspective.

To be fair, both my friend’s boss and the sales manager from the story clearly didn’t realize how important showing appreciation and connecting is to these Blues—or they most likely would have made an effort. Reds are logical individuals, so IF they can see the reasoning behind why it makes sense to do something, they will generally make it happen. Not to mention, Reds are very loyal and fierce fighters for causes and people they care about—it’s just that many times,  because of their tremendous focus and need for efficiency, they get tunnel vision in getting from A to B and forget about other’s needs. 

Also, it’s fair to say that the sales manager had 30 people to call and a job to do. He most likely didn’t have the time to chat with Tom—or at the very least saw it as a waste of time. This focus and efficiency is partially what makes Reds so excellent in business. The drive, vision, and leadership qualities of a Red are tough to beat. In fact, Dr. Hartman always says that he “would follow a healthy Red to the ends of the earth,” and I agree with him 100 percent. From personal experience, whenever I work with a Red on a project, I literally get at least double the work done in half the time!

So what’s the takeaway? Clearly both personalities bring so much to the table—especially in business—that it behooves both Reds and Blues to understand this dynamic between them.

Hopefully these insights gave you a few things to think about. And, of course, if you want to know more, you can check out our social media posts. Additionally, your full Color Code personality report and the bonus videos that come with it go over this relationship blend in the greatest detail.

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Joe England has known about the Color Code ever since 1994 when his Grandpa caused quite a family controversy by “quick coding” everyone.  Luckily, Joe could see the value in what Grandpa Don was going for and years later, when the opportunity arose to work for the Color Code, Joe jumped at the chance. He is a Yellow, enjoys Swedish Fish and typically gets along with children better than adults.