My son is only 4 years old, but I can tell you right now he is a Red personality.

Thankfully I’ve had the Color Code in my life since before he was born so what would have DEFINITELY upset me without having a prior knowledge of Motive now has become a matter of amusement, appreciation and guidance. That’s the big gift of Color Code for parents as far as I can see it. It gives us tools to speak our kids’ languages and see where they’re coming from instead of wanting to kill them at times. 😉

So, with that in mind, for today’s post I thought I would share with you five tips that seem to do wonders in the lives of a Red child and his/her parent based on both the research of Color Code and the personal experiences of a few of us here in the office. We challenge you to apply them and write us back in the comments with how things are going. We bet you will be surprised at how helpful they can be — even if they just help you keep your cool when you’d rather scream…

And one last thing before we dive in: Remember, we preach 100% Responsibility here at the Color Code so have some fun dreaming up ways to implement these ideas into your own parenting style! Here we go:

1. Present all your issues logically. Yes, yes you’ve heard that before but let’s put it in the context of a Red kid. Most children naturally want to know the whats and whys of life but Reds feel this want much stronger than the other personality types. Why they have to do something in particular lol. And don’t say to them, “Well, if you love me” or “Because I’m your father” — that won’t work so hot with them. Remember they have that logical drive. They are not looking for direction in the name of emotion. They literally want to know why they have to do it from a logical angle. Of course, this doesn’t always work well, and sometimes you just gotta say, “because I said so,” but as long as you know that they innately crave logic you’ll be in better shape.

2. Just like with adult Reds, you need to be direct and brief in your conversations with a Red child. They don’t want all the details. Be very specific and very brief as a general rule and then feel it out from there. This used to annoy me, but now I appreciate how much time my son saves me when he just wants to cut to the chase, because, I mean, as parents we are very busy all the time, right? Finding ways to look on the bright side of my son’s limitations has been a lifesaver. I encourage you to give it a try.

3. Offer them leadership opportunities. There’s a good chance our Red children are probably better leaders than we ever will be lol. And talk about negotiating skills. My 4-year-old can run circles around me, both his grandmas and grandpa without breaking a sweat. He seriously negotiates deals I never would’ve dreamed of as a child lol. It’s amazing. And according to office chat, my son is definitely not the only Red around with these mad skills. Even Red children can be more organized, more precise, more direct than some adults! Sure, they’re blunt, a little rough around the edges and you have to work with them, but be grateful you have a Red child if only for this strength because it means they certainly won’t be surfing your couch in 20 years. Instead, they probably will be running the country or some big corporation!

4. Support their decisive nature. One awesome tip I picked up from Dr. Hartman (the author of “The Color Code”) years ago that has helped me with my son in the mornings is this: If you have a child that’s around three or four and wants to wear only what they want to wear, that’s not a problem, you simply say, “You may wear this or this.” And if they start fighting you, say, “You may wear this or this, or anything else you can pick in one minute.” You’ll be amazed. You’ll own them, because they will show you how quick they are. Typically, they won’t wear what you want them to wear, but it doesn’t matter. You made your point AND you’ve supported their decisive nature and can still get out the door in time. Boom!

5. Finally, don’t take their arguments personally. If they tell you they hate you it doesn’t mean a thing. We promise. It just means they didn’t get their way. We’ve discussed this many times around the office (as I mentioned, a few of us are raising Reds). They are just upset and will get over it quickly and expect you to do the same. This has been the case 100 percent of the time as all of us knew better than to let it turn into a “big deal” by getting hung up about it on an emotional level. Thanks, Color Code 🙂

Well there you go! Five tips for parenting your Red child like a pro! We hope you find them useful and make the time to implement them as you see fit! And for the parents of Reds out there: What other ideas have worked for you? Please share in the comments so we can all help each other out. After all, it takes a village. 😉

Here’s to you and your Red.

Cheers!

Joe England and The Color Code Team

Joe England has known about the Color Code ever since 1994 when his Grandpa caused quite a family controversy by “quick coding” everyone.  Luckily, Joe could see the value in what Grandpa Don was going for and years later, when the opportunity arose to work for the Color Code in marketing and product development, Joe jumped at the chance. He is a Yellow, enjoys Swedish Fish, travel, surfing, snowboarding and being a dad.