Cynthia

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Dear Cynthia,

First of all, I’m glad that you enjoyed the training. The classes are meant to be a rich learning, growth-oriented, and overall positive experience. They’re usually a lot of fun, too, which is always nice. 🙂

But let’s talk about your “Mr. Justification” now…

I wouldn’t say this is a terribly common scenario, because we try to emphasize the concept of taking 100% responsibility for the success of your relationships throughout the workshop. However, I wouldn’t say that it’s a rare occurrence either.

The fact is, if a person is unwilling to change or feels that other people should simply always cater to him, then you do tend to run into these kinds of issues.

Here’s how I would discuss it.

The Color Code can either be utilized as a tool or as a weapon.

The whole goal of learning this material, of course, is to be able to use the Color Code as a tool. We use the Color Code to improve communication, strengthen leadership, reduce conflict, build rapport, encourage others, and create success on both an individual contributor level and as a team.

Certain individuals – again, usually a miniscule percentage of people – may, on the other hand, choose to use the Color Code as a weapon. To understand this completely, you have to think both in terms of weapons of offense and defense.

For example, using this as a weapon of offense might mean that the person chooses to stereotype others. This generally takes the form of limiting their opportunities or “putting them in a box”, so to speak. It’s when you refuse to promote someone to a leadership position because, “Whites can’t be decisive”, or “Yellow’s aren’t responsible”, etc.

That kind of approach is quite blatant and completely ignorant. First of all, any Color can succeed in any job. That’s a fact. Second of all, each individual is different. We all have different strengths and limitations and we all learn and adapt over the course of our lives.

The Color Code should never limit anyone. Rather, it is designed to empower.

Let’s talk next of using this as a weapon of defense—think “shield” or “armor”. This is what you are observing in your co-worker, and it is actually more common than the previous, offense-based scenario.

You said that your team member has been using the Color Code as a means to excuse the way he acts, and I’ve seen this many, many times before. For example, an overly aggressive or critical Red who generally treats people poorly might excuse his/her behavior by saying something like, “Listen, you all went to the training and should know that’s just how Reds are. So, just stop taking what I say personally and get your work done!”

And it’s not just Reds, of course… ALL Colors do it.

Blues will excuse themselves for being moody, suspicious, or self-righteous. Whites have reasons for being non-communicative, unmotivated, or socially aloof. Yellows say they can’t possibly be blamed for being irresponsible, forgetful, or uncommitted.

(And that’s just scratching the surface).

Of course the more insecure an individual is, the more likely they will be to justify their bad behavior or blame others for their problems.

The bottom line is that limitations are limitations, period.

Just because you are a Blue, for example, doesn’t give you license to judge others. That’s a limitation that you would do well to work at eliminating.

So remember, the Color Code is a tool, not a weapon. It is designed to help us overcome our limitations and perform on a much higher level, not cripple ourselves with excuses.

Good luck to you, Cynthia. I hope this helped.
Very best of living,

Jeremy

Jeremy Daniel (Core Color: Yellow) has been working with the Color Code since 1998 in various capacities from training in the field personally with Dr. Taylor Hartman to designing customized corporate solutions and new training programs for various industries.  To ask about Jeremy’s training or speaking services, please email and inquiry to jeremy@colorcodetraining.com.